JUST SAY NO! Part 2.

Last week marked the inaugural debut of a new column here on The Daily Dish called JUST SAY NO!.

JUST SAY NO! is intended to help women (and future women) make better choices for themselves by JUST SAYING NO! to something I have deemed 100% truly awful.

For the Second installment of JUST SAY NO!, I would like to talk about this article. For those who have not heard of this brand new phenomenon, the article is about (prepare yourselves) … A MAN Having a Baby.

WOW. Pregnancy. Once thought to be the exclusive realm of females planet-wide – now being co-opted by none other than… a Man.

My knee-jerk reaction, in order:

HOLY SH*T!!!!
and HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YES. Definitely something we did not discuss in 8th, 10th nor indeed 12th grade health class. This is something I had never, frankly, even thought about EVER. Except in jokes. But now, folks, it is reality. A bearded man is now indeed pregnant. And I for one am (in semi-equal parts) THRILLED!!!! as well as NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT. AT ALL.

Men. FINALLLLLLLLLY will be PAYING THEIR DUES.

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

No more knocking us up and then hitting the road. SAY SO LONG fellas to cheap tawdry flings. B/c Now you MIGHT JUST HAVE TO PAY. And I ain’t talking about paternity. Yup. Time to break out those pouchy pants, and say hello to stretch marks. Get ready for MOOD SWING CENTRAL, Boys! It’s all about YOU now!!! WOOHOO!

Men. I love them. My dad is great. My husband is MARRRRVELOUS. But. BUT.

BUT WHATTHEHELL??? Men already get a whole heaping helping of perks. They get better pay than us. They get better jobs than us. As Hillary will tell you, The whole world is geared and run by MEN as a sexist elite-est paradise.. Right?

SO. We WOMEN used to have ONE THING WE COULD DO THAT MEN COULDN’T. WE could have babies. WE were the REASON we were all around. RIGHT> Right! If it weren’t for us women, the whole human race would just drop dead, never to be repopulated. Those men. What can they do, really???

Except NOW.

EXCEPT that if you read the fine print, you will find this Man is reaaaaaaaaallllllllyyyy deep down inside, a Woman. With woman parts. You know. A uterus. Fallopian tubes. Vagina. Hmmm.

So. Is this really a MAN having a baby??

If the definition of female is:

1. a person bearing two X chromosomes in the cell nuclei and normally having a vagina, a uterus and ovaries, and developing at puberty a relatively rounded body and enlarged breasts, and retaining a beardless face; a girl or woman.
2. an organism of the sex or sexual phase that normally produces egg cells.

wouldn’t this MAN still technically be a woman? Really? Even though he/she has a beard and no breasts??

I am confused. But apparently I am not the only one.

So, for now, I am JUST SAYING NO! To Men Having Babies. Just b/c.

13 thoughts on “JUST SAY NO! Part 2.

  1. NO WAY is that a man. It is such a scam. This chick decides she wants to be a man, but she keeps all her “parts,” hooks up with another chick, but even tho chick #1 is supposed to be the more maleish person, she decides to have the baby – it is a WOMAN having a baby, albeit a very confused woman. Or a schemer that thought this would be the way to be rich and famous. Of course all the money will have to go to pay for therapy for the poor KID!!! Plus now that the woman can’t take male hormones anymore, she probably has lost the beard and grown the bosoms anyhow. This issue doesn’t make me HOT or anything!!!

  2. ” So, for now, I am JUST SAYING NO! To Men Having Babies. Just b/c.”

    Roger that, and I concur.

  3. I was already to answer this with,
    “Yes but this is not really a man having a baby, because technically, it’s a woman…”
    Yes, you knew that…
    I hope men never have babies…, imagine the whining and moaning and complaining we’d have to put up with… you’ve seen a man with a runny nose, unable to get out bed because of Pneumonia…. ;o)

  4. Yeah, I figured it would have to be a trans-sexual cause boys just don’t have the parts nor should they!!! That said, being a perimenopausal woman, I really would like for the male population to suffer erratic periods with cramps, labor pains, mood swings, hot flashes, finding an empty bathroom opposed to a tree…never mind…my husband suffers enough when I’m in a “mood”

  5. CurlyWurlyGuy is freaking me out. Dishy!!! What have you done? This post has offset the balance nature and the universe itself. I hope you’re happy. 😉

  6. Tracey’s (Tracies, Tracys) do have great taste. That’s what the name means. Name meaning – to have great taste.
    See! It says it up there. :o)
    Dish Lady it’s time to take a break from the parental control task 9and all the fun you are having!) and come blog! Leave the dog and the parrot in charge, they’ll be fine. ;o)

  7. HAHAH! CurlyWurly GUY is the funniest thing EVER. And as you can tell I did put the bird in charge today so I could catch up on my email & blogging fun. LOVE IT!

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