Stuff I would like to have.

This is a page for people who want to get to know me a little bit better. One way to get to know someone (without pawing through their garbage) is by looking at their wish list! You see, I don’t have a lot of extra money, and I don’t buy much for myself. But before you start to cry because that is so sad, please know that I do not feel deprived. Oh NO! Because you can buy these things for me! And isn’t it always better to give than to receive? at least in your case? And also, isn’t it always fun to get a gift? It is for me! I LOVE PRESENTS!!! YAY!!!

So now I am going to talk about some of the stuff I would like to have.

1. I would like an attractive swim cap.

My family and I go swimming once a week at a local community pool. Since my hair is longer than shoulder length, I have to don a swim cap. The first week I didn’t have one, so I had to borrow a loaner from the Lost and Found. After squeezing it onto my head and having my husband tease me about cooties, I looked like this:

The next week I bought my own. But as luck would have it, it’s way too big and every time I go underwater it pops off and threatens to float away.  I want to keep swimming but this cap thing is too much. Please, won’t you buy me a better fitting swim cap and do us all a favor?

2. I would like this book:

I am not a dummie per se, but I am a dummy when it comes to knitting, so I think this would be a great book for me. My husband bought me a “Wool Scarf Kit” for Christmas, he got it at a children’s toy store, and it says age 8 and up on the bag. It came with hokey fat plastic needles and yarn and everything, but I cannot figure out the directions to save my life. I don’t know what a slip knot is and it doesn’t even try to explain. I looked online and am feeling a bit overwhelmed. I think a book intended for the truly challenged could save my life when it comes to knitting, so won’t you please buy this for me? I would like to knit myself a nice warm scarf. It’s cold here in Maine, even in June.

3. I would like this toy:

It is not really truly for me, but it is for my bird, who believes I’m her toy, so it is intended to act as my sit-in. I would like a little time off from the constant chewing and pecking, so if you would be so kind as to buy “Coconut Monkey Man” for my bird, perhaps the open wound on my right ear will finally heal.

So that’s about it for now. You can see by my choices I am not a very materialistic person and I hope that works in my favor. I will delete stuff as you buy it and send it to me. That is only courtesy to the next person, who really shouldn’t have to shell out money for a swim cap when you’ve already sent me one. And I only need one. Really.

Thank you.

42 thoughts on “Stuff I would like to have.

  1. a. you are v. funny.
    b. you should check paperbackswap or half.com for the books you want—you could get them on the cheap.
    c. i got a le creuset dutch oven at homegoods for v. v. cheap! (not that i have used it yet…but i have it if the need should present itself.)

  2. OOooooooh CONNIE, I WOULD LOOOVEE A GREEN SCARF. Yes, please send one immediately to the address above. AND HURRY! Before it gets too warm and I am having to wear it with my t-shirt.

  3. Christi… I hope this is ok I’ve written here. I could not quite figure the address at the bottom of the page. I have a couple of easy questions and need an email in which to write… Thanx
    Talk to you soon… And LOVE your site!

  4. Christy, This is a great website — WELL DONE!!! I have the dutch oven in blue above and highly recommend it. It is expensive, although well worth every cent. Perhaps you can find one on ebay? It is extremely heavy to lift, so you have to be dedicated to want to have one in your life. Perhaps someone less enamored will be parting with theirs?

  5. Hey Tammy!! THANKS! I am not of course expecting you to ship your lovely Dutch oven from Australia, though if you are fabulously rich I would not say NO. I will keep my eyes open for one here in the US. eBay is a good idea. I am still holding out for a #1 fan to purchase one for me, but I may be holding out a loooong time. Oh well. Wish me luck. xo

  6. are you serious,setting up a website asking for people to send you stuff for FREE ? have you no dignity,i guess not.you said you live in a large estate so you are obviously not in need of free stuff,just too cheap to buy it.
    shame on you.

  7. YES Mary K! I am indeed cheap – cheap beyond measure – and I am not just asking, I am indeed EXPECTING YOU _ Mary K – to send me everything my little heart desires. You must fill my palatial West Philly estate top to bottom w/ the fruits of your labor. And just to show you that I too am generous at heart, I will send you A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF GULLIBILITY at no charge. Oh… I see you already have one. Good luck!

  8. mommy i would like to tell you that if i had enough money that i would buy that little bead doll , love you sooooo much i hope you have a good time at the pool,love you mommy buy.

  9. Mads you are too sneaky. You and your comments. Don’t worry babe – you don’t need to buy Beetle Man for Kiwi – just let her chew on you for a while so Mommy gets a break! LOVE YOU! xo

  10. mommy # 1. i am very snekey. # 2. kiwi is not going to chew me apart.#3. i love you soooooo much , yes world were going to vermont .waaaaaaahhhhhooooo vermont home of ben and jerrys ice-cream ,yes.

  11. im from malaysia. was having a really miserable day. then. stumbled over this ” stuff i would like to have” part that u sectioned out in ur blog. omgsh. u funny funny person. it had definitely put a smile on my face. the world would be better filled with amusing ppl like you. god bless u =)

  12. I found this website searching for ‘natural’ blonde info. You are hilarious!!! Have you read the Jen Lancaster book series? You need to find a way to make a living at writing.

  13. I love your choice of dutch oven! I know it sounds nerdy but I totally want a dutch over as well…but I think I would like it in blue!

  14. Curls, I am NOT holding my breath. The only person to have consulted this list in earnest was my mom at Christmastime. Unfortunately I had to return the Dutch Oven b/c it was chipped, and the money went to buy Maddie new boots. Not exactly what I’d imagined.

    YES pans!! I want a cheesesteak!

  15. Nice choices. My list would likely fill the Internet or at least my allotted blog space. Keep visiting your local charity shops. A relative of mine got a beautiful le creuset casserole for $5! Never know what you may find.

    1. Hint: successful spies do not alert the public to their presence EVER. I advise you to do the same. PS: I also suggest you tone down the volume. I can hear you and you are not even on the same floor as me. and I am half deaf. w/ earplugs in. Good luck!

  16. What a great idea! Has anyone bought any of these items for you yet? I’m thinking if I incorporate this money saving plan into my blog, I may never have to buy socks again. Other things too, of course. Right now I just need some socks. It really could go anywhere from there. The sky’s the limit!

    1. Hey, thanks! Response to this page has ranged from outrage to sheer amusement. I much prefer the latter.

      YES, I have actually received two things in the mail.

      1) a dutch oven (which you can read all about here), and

      2) not one, but TWO copies of Born Standing Up, Steve Martin’s autobiography. one from a friend, and one from my folks. My mother actually consulted this list in earnest several Christmases ago!

  17. Hi,
    I’ve been looking all over for realistic animals–in particular vultures. I think playmobil has some. But, I used to get small, very realistic, plastic animals but I can’t find the source–one maker was German and started with “Sch…” and the other had a more generic name. There was also a maker of excellent small ceramic figures. Can you help me? Thank you so very much.
    Manette

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