Happy Birthday BABY!!

If you asked me on any random day what I was doing precisely 8 years ago, I would be hard pressed to tell you. But today is an exception. B/c 8 years ago at this very moment I was in labor with my first child. And today – 8 years later – she is as spectacularly enchanting as ever. Please join me in wishing Maddie a super special 8th birthday. I LOVE YOU BABY.









New life.

Well my good friend had her baby yesterday, and I am very pleased to announce it is a BOY. Which is what I picked in the baby pool (NOT the laboring pool, but the gambling set-up where we each placed a $5 wager on date/weight/gender). I guessed he wouldn’t be born till Sunday, so I probably didn’t win the prize, which stinks b/c it is a really nice bottle of WINE. Plus I guessed he would weigh 6 lbs. 8 oz. and he was really 8 lbs. 10 oz. So I was just a little bit off on that too. Oh well.

I did not actually go over and get into the laboring pool with my friend – though of course I would have liked to. I have always dreamed of having my own indoor swimming pool. And my younger daughter was of course very interested in the prospect. But when I talked to her husband on the phone and heard her moaning something awful in the background, I thought hopping over in my swimsuit and squeezing in beside her might be slightly uncomfortable. Especially with my daughter in her swim fins. and blow-up Hershey Bar floaty.

I was however EXTREMELY EXCITED to hear that she did ultimately give birth on my beloved former couch. YAY!! Now I will have an even greater special place in my heart for that beautiful sofa forever and ever. What a magical place to sit NOW, huh? What a great couch. WOW.

So last night I went by to see my friend and meet her beautiful new baby BOY, and I have to tell you, he is just the cutest little creature I have seen. And because he was over 8 1/2 lbs, he is so snuggly and chubby and adorable. My daughters were both like 7 lbs. and let me tell you – that makes for easier pushing but those skinny babies look like old men. Those fat turkey-sized babies are ADORABLE> all plumped out and full and just sooooo squeezable. I am so incredibly happy & excited for them!! And I am getting SOOOO excited to hold that freshly minted baby and coo and make little cutesie faces at him. Babies just LOVE that kind of stuff. Almost as much as boobies.

But last night he was not paying too much attention to too much, other than momma. He seemed a little disoriented, and I think we can all appreciate THAT. Remember how you felt right after being born? Yeah, me too. But soon, I will be able to hold him and then he will know me, and I will be able to live vicariously through my friend – having a SON – AND Then when he starts bawling, I will give him a quick kiss & hand him right back over to his momma. B/c THAT is the great thing about your friend having a baby versus you having a baby. YAY!

WELL I just wanted to give a shout-out to the world welcoming this new little life to the planet. And an even bigger shout-out to my friends. CONGRATULATIONS, J, D & U!!  IT’S SO WONDERFUL!!!!  YAY!!!!!

AND OF COURSE Welcome Baby S.L.S.!! I love you already.

My weekend so far, part 2

So last night, after we waited in line for a looooooooong looooooonnng time at the Borgata Buffet, we finally got seated. And even though our table was in the back darkened corner of the restaurant, adjacent to a flat-panel TV playing a show about the criminally insane, I rejoiced. Not only b/c I was FINALLY GOING TO GET TO EAT!!! but also b/c I was SO RELIEVED not to have to sit in a booth right beside the salivating onlookers still waiting in line. SO We filled our plates with heaping helpings of yum-yum food, and grazed to our hearts content. Then when we were stuffed to the brim, we discovered that they’d held out on us. Those chefs at the Borgata Buffet had not told us there were going to be shrimp with appendages. But sure enough, there they were. Heads-on, claws-on, shells-on shrimp – with their long cat-fish like antennae sticking out every which way. I am not sure I would have wanted to eat one, but that’s not the point, is it? We didn’t have the opportunity to decline them. People at all of the adjacent tables began bellying up with these crazy things and we just sat there, open mouthed. Oh well. Maybe next time. Afterwards we people-watched and played some slots. It’s almost amusing how quickly you can lose $20 in a slot machine, but it is not really funny.

This morning when our girls came home, our younger daughter had a black eye. Now before you get all riled up, let me say our friends did NOT beat her. At around 5 AM, they heard a loud THUNK from up above and ran up to find my younger daughter bleeding from the head and crying. Can you imagine? I know if this had happened to me I would likely be thinking HOW THEY HELL AM I GOING TO EXPLAIN THIS ONE?? Our daughter had unfortunately fallen out of bed, sound asleep, and cracked her head on the nightstand. YOUCH. My friend wanted to bandage her up, but she’d already fallen back asleep. She told me she’d never been so relieved in her life as when 1) she determined my daughter had not lost her eye, and 2) when the kids got up this morning and my younger daughter was functioning normally. I think she would have felt really bad returning her broken. Kids are so resilient, it’s the adults I worry about.

And so I am now back from the baby shower, and what a great time. I always thought these things were dull, but no way. I have never been to such a fun baby shower in all of my life. I could tell that baby was just raring to come out and join us. And who wouldn’t be, with all that food and WINE?? AND What a lot of great loot! Those people were terrific gift givers. In fact, I would like to invite many of my friend’s friends to MY next baby shower. and I am not even pregnant. And that is a good thing b/c I think I am a little hungover from that baby shower. I even got to see my old beloved couch.

It was right next to my friend’s laboring pool. It looks so fun, I told her I was going to come over in my swimsuit when she was laboring and get right in with her. Then I can lie on the couch and watch the birth. Just joking. I am not good with blood. Though I must tell you, my younger daughter asked me the other day – with complete earnestness – when she was going to get to see J’s baby being born. After much puzzling, I finally asked Honey, do you mean you want to watch J.’s baby coming out of her vagina? (My kids KNOW about birth). And she said, Oh, yes. like it was the most normal request ever. I had to tell her that I didn’t think J. was going to want her watching. But still.. Kids say the darnedest things.