Meet My House.

October 22, 2009July 27, 2022 ~ thedailydish ~ 14 Comments

Nearly 2 months since closing & I’m still awestruck each time I come home.

Welcome to my “new” house. Better known as the Francis Waldo-Daniel Dole House of Stroudwater Village, Portland. Yes, that is a mouthful.

Above is a street view taken a century ago. Here’s what it looks like today.

This is the view from the back. The house itself is spectacular, but it’s the yard that first drew us in. Talk about beautiful. Waking up to this each morning makes me thank God I am alive. Although we’re still in Portland, we’re about as far away from the Old Port as you can be w/in city limits – about 10 minutes by car. The feel of the place is suburban, almost rural. Our neighborhood, Stroudwater Village, is one of the oldest sections of the city, founded in 1658 (according to the sign on Congress Street), but more often stated as 1727. Our house – the Dole House – predates the American Revolution. But we have yet to determine its exact age. The former owners give the date as 1740. We have a book which claims it was built between 1760 and 65. An online reference states 1771-2. At this point it’s anyone’s guess. Officially, the oldest home in Portland – The Tate House – is right down the street and was built in 1755. But it’s owned by an historical society and maintained as a museum. It could be reasonably argued our house is the oldest surviving colonial residence in Portland.

My quest for the perfect winter coat. SUCCESS!!

October 15, 2009 ~ thedailydish ~ 16 Comments

After days spent searching, my quest has finally come to an end. And though it might sound like an endorsement of polygamy – which it is NOT. I am here to announce my perfect coat is not actually ONE coat, But Two.

Meet Coat No. 1. The Spyder Glacier Jacket by Spyder Active Sports.

Facts:

1) This jacket is the MOST BAD ASS COAT EVER. It makes me feel like a million bucks. Which – given its MSRP of $600 FREAKING DOLLARS, I guess isn’t too far from the truth. Fortunately I got mine at the super ski-tastic sale going on right now @ T.J. Maxx in South Portland. And since you get the max for the minimum at T.J. Maxx, you know I did not pay full price.

2) As you can see from the photo below, my arms are indeed long. Yet this jacket does not leave inches of flesh exposed to the elements.

LISTEN UP, L.L.BEAN! Tall women w/ long arms are people too. In this case, people w/ cash. And though I did pay a good deal more for this Spyder jacket than I would have at your most beloved of Maine institutions, it was worth every penny. My advice? Next season, branch out.

3) Speaking of sleeve length. When I found this coat – in T.J.MAXX of South Portland w/ its super ski-tastic sale going on right now – I nearly swooned. It was IT. Hood – check. Front zipper – check. Roomy pockets – check & check. ADEQUATE SLEEVE LENGTH? With room to SPARE. But there’s more. The cuffs have adjustable velcro closures to keep out all the cold.

AND – the Best part ever? There are spandex half gloves – BUILT RIGHT IN!!!!! So no breeze will ever billow up my sleeve, my sleeve will never come loose from my glove, and every day will be better than the day before.

4) While I am discussing the superb features of this coat. I would like to compliment the genius designer who came up w/ this lil beauty. B/c it ROCKS. We have something here along the southern coast of Maine. Both a blessing & a curse, it is called coastal air. In the summer, the ocean breezes are a DREAM. But as the weather gets colder, and then colder still, this body numbing blustery wind has a unique effect on the bones. I liken it to death. So when I saw that this coat not only had a hood, but a hood w/ all sorts of hidden toggles, to cinch in my heat from that fearful icy wind, I thought to myself. BLOODY GENIUS.

PS: When I discovered two days ago that said hood also features a built-in VISOR. I nearly cried.

5) We have a running joke in our family about how much spiders love me. Wherever I go, Poof! there they are. As a child, I used to find them crawling on me in the night. Two months ago, a spider literally FELL FROM THE SKY right on top of my head. So imagine the jokes when I found this perfect coat, made by Spyder. With a spider logo right there on the chest. Calling all my minions to rally round and/or jump right onto me. It was fate.

But – I hear you asking – if this coat is so darn perfect (which everyone knows it is) then why Coat No. 2??

Like most stories about mothers and daughters and winter coats, this one isn’t simple. B.c it gets cold here in Portland. Really cold. Like, right now – even though it’s only mid-October, it’s 41 degrees. Sure, that’s warm in Alaska. But compared to HOTLANTA? nothing doing. My mommy is checking those weather forecasts every morning in the AJC. She already knows there’s a 40% chance of snow tomorrow in Portland. And being too far away to wind a scarf round my head, she wants to make 250% sure that I am warm. Like all good Mommies, nothing is ever good enough for her baby. Even when it’s a $600 FREAKING DOLLAR TOP OF THE LINE SKI JACKET MADE FOR PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES CASCADING DOWN MOUNTAINTOPS AT HYPER VELOCITY IN THE DEAD OF WINTER. It’s just a coat. A coat which doesn’t cover her baby’s tushy. THAT’S RIGHT! Even when baby is 3 decades out of diapers, momma still wants to dress you. SO/to recap. Not even the BEST is good enough for me. My beloved Spyder Glacier Jacket only comes to my waist. Leaving my derriere and nether regions exposed & vulnerable. I’ve got a brand new unbelievably pricy Spyder jacket now hanging (next to my forlorn former coat) in the closet, and I was STILL getting suggestions from my mom about long puffy parkas from The North Face. I felt like a newlywed, whose mother continues forwarding links to eligible bachelors on Match.com. Knowing this would not end until we were both satisfied, I soldiered on. It was essential to find yet another perfect coat. One which would cover my sensitive butt-ular regions, my chicken thighs, and perhaps – if I was lucky – even my two underinsulated kneecaps. And so I went. Back to that blessed Maine institution with the two first initials & the heavenly last name spelling out the very best of good fortune. NO, NOT L.L.BEAN!! I am talking about T.J. Maxx of South Portland. And as fate would have it. I scored once again. High five.

Meet Coat No. 2. Black Rivet brand 3/4 length parka.

Facts:

1) I love the fit of this coat. After trying on countless iterations of the same theme and being horrified by the marshmallow staring back at me from the mirror, I was genuinely pleased w/ this style. It is lengthy and provides the warmth I need, without the look of an overstuffed sausage. It manages to be both lightweight, yet well insulated. Wearing it, I look more like a sleek female seal than a male walrus, and for this I am grateful.

2) This coat has good features. For instance, the zipper. It works. Don’t laugh. If you had tried on as many coats w/ crap zippers as I have, you would know it’s no joke. Easy on & off, zero hassle. Check. A built-in hood, both roomy & warm – NO FUR TRIM – and without so much hang it renders me blind. Check. Only downside: I truly wish it had cinching toggles each side, but not every hood is perfect. I will wear this one w/ a hat.

Fortunately, this coat makes up for it in a very high neck. I like these types of collars. They are practical, providing excellent wind protection, plus they are attractive. The two zippered pockets are lined and roomy enough for my (very large) hands. Check & check.

3) The sleeves are long enough. HINT HINT L.L.BEAN.

4) Despite all the pluses. I am not big on the shiny factor of this coat. Although some may think it pretty and satin sheen seems quite the rage this season, this would not have been my first choice. Nor my second, nor frankly my 15th. The last time I owned a satin coat I was in late elementary school. Something about the shininess makes me feel like a little kid wearing brand new patent leather shoes, terrified of getting them scuffed. It also reminds me of Morticia Adams and/or the inside liner of a coffin. But I liked everything else so much, I am pretending i like the satin sheen too. Yes i am one of the satin ladies. Bling-bling. That’s no supernova – it’s just me in my new coat. Yay.

5) This coat, unlike my beloved Spyder, cost less than a casino outing. And at $49.99 a little sheen never hurt.

I want to be a Roller Girl.

June 15, 2009 ~ thedailydish ~ 35 Comments

For years I have harbored a secret desire to do something that both thrills & terrifies me to the core. And today I am finally telling the world.

I want to be a Roller Girl.

You may not be familiar with Flat Track Roller Derby. To be honest, I’m a newbie myself. But when I first heard about it, several years ago in Philadelphia, I was blown away. Roller Derby is simply the coolest, most empowering sport for women EVER. I wanted to try out for the Philly Roller Girls then and there, but.. But… I didn’t know enough about it. I’d never even been to a game! At the time, my kids were small, and to top it off – I have Meniere’s Disease. B/c of Meniere’s I can’t do all sorts of things. Eat salt, Fly, listen to an iPod, have dental work, the list goes on. Can you imagine what ROLLER DERBY COULD DO TO ME??!! In short: I was afraid. Very afraid. Of getting hurt, of getting vertigo, of putting myself OUT THERE. And so *Roller Girl* got shelved. Until last week. When I read the Philly Liberty Belles were coming to town. Saturday night, instead of sitting on the couch watching a movie, I took Maddie to the Portland Expo for our very first Roller Derby.

WOOT!!

If you are new to this sport, like me, then you may have questions. Important questions. Like The Rules. I’ll be honest. I don’t know them. But having watched one bout, here’s what I’ve learned. The bout (or game) is divided into two 30-minute periods, separated by a 20-minute intermission. The basic gist – and forgive me if I am wrong – 5 skaters from each team are on a circuit track. Eight women (4 from each team) form a big heap up front.

The remaining 2 girls (one from each team) start behind on a different line. They are the Jammers. They score points.

The whistle blows. The pack takes off skating and the jammers follow. The women up front try to block the opposing team’s jammer from breaking through the pack. The jammers each try to break past the pack to get out in front. The best jammers act as both offense (trying to get out in front), as well as defense (simultaneously blocking their opponent jammer). Whichever jammer gets in front of the pack first is pointed out as LEAD JAMMER by a whistle toot and a pointing referee. That lead jammer now skates round the track to score points. The rest of her team tries to keep the other jammer back.

Players can get penalties for doing bad stuff. I am not sure exactly what. But it seemed to involve pain. Or maybe just poking.. It’s hard to tell.

When a player is bad they get sent to the penalty box for a period of time.

Those three people on the stage (behind the penalty box) were the MCs. They were great. Providing running commentary and helpful tidbits of information all bout long. I particularly liked the way they kept encouraging the crowd to root for both teams and give lots of love to all the players. No nasty bloodlust here! Also fun was the interaction between MCs and the “Beer Garden” crowd. HOW’S EVERYONE IN THE BEER GARDEN? they would ask — to a ROARING response. I LOVE ROLLER DERBY!

Unlike many other sports (I am talking to YOU, golf) Roller Derby is ACTION PACKED and incredibly entertaining to watch. The bout literally flew by!

One thing that struck me about the sport is how incredibly supportive all of the women are toward each other – opponents included. Before and after the game, the teams lined up to slap hands.

And at the end of the bout, the teams huddled to select an MVP from the opposing team.

Each MVP was announced and then given the opportunity to speak to the crowd; both heaped praise on the opposing team. It was lovely. A sport that not only empowers women to be strong and fierce, but celebrates each others talents – WELL. Count me in.

After the bout we stayed to meet many of the Liberty Belles. Maddie had them sign her program.

Everyone was super nice, and more than one player encouraged me to try out. When I asked BUT Won’t I get the crap kicked out of me?? I was told Of COURSE! EVERYONE DOES.

HOW CAN I RESIST?!

Even the refs look GREAT!

WANNA KNOW MORE?? ME TOO.

Wikipedia’s entry on Roller Derby.

CART ATTACK!

May 1, 2009 ~ thedailydish ~ 13 Comments

On Monday, I had to run a bunch of errands. We have only one car – which my husband now uses to commute for work, so that meant walking 40 minutes into town. No big deal. To kill as many birds with 1 stone, I brought along my beloved push-shopping cart. It looks like this:

Except mine is black. Now, this cart is something I used w/ regularity in Philly. You see them everywhere and people never give them a second look, ever.

WELL. LET ME TELL YOU FOLKS. After pushing my trusty black cart into town and back this past Monday, I have deduced that these carts are NOT – I repeat NOT – used here in Portland, except by the homeless. Rather than treat me like the environmentally conscious, DIY type I’d imagined myself to be:

To the majority of people, I apparently looked more like:

WHAT THE HELL?? For a city that’s supposedly GREEN in oh so many ways, these Portland folks were downright surly towards me & the cart. Like that a-hole in the main post office. YEAH B*TCH, I AM TALKING TO YOU, you snooty-faced weasel. How DARE you SCOWL at me and my cart, looking us up and down, when we turned to smile and say hello to you. Didn’t your momma ever warn you about your face freezing like that?? You KNOW it’s cold enough here for that to happen. AND YOU. YOU SMARMY BALDING GIT, with your ugly suit and greasy hair. If ONLY you could have read my mind when you gave me that fish-lipped smirk. OH YES.

It is obvious that some of the uptight jerkwads residing here in Portland have never seen a red-blooded woman pushing her overpriced whole foods groceries home in a folding cart EVER. I will not comment on the size of their wieners, but I should. Because the rest of them is SMALL. It is narrow-minded and childish to treat anyone with contempt, simply for doing what they need to do. Me and the cart – we are above that. So the next time we go shopping in town, you uppity lot better WATCH OUT. I have an airhorn, and I know how to use it.

SO???

April 9, 2009 ~ thedailydish ~ 10 Comments

— On Wed, 4/8/09, <curlywurlygurly@verizon.net> wrote:

So, how goes your new life in Maine?  How's john's job?
The girls are making friends and enjoying school??
you've unpacked all the boxes and set up
house? Let me know. xoxo

I know this isn’t QUITE what you were expecting Curls, but as I’ve already discussed feet, underwear, and copulating animals crackers here.. why not get a little personal? So here goes.

19 days in Portland. and we are settling in well. The boxes are all unpacked (save for those hidden beneath our beds and they DO NOT COUNT), and the apartment is in order. I have to say, coming from a 3 story house I’d never have imagined I’d like any apartment, but I truly love this place. So sun filled and spacious; my plants have never known such bliss. John seems to be enjoying his new job, which is much the same as his old job @ PENN, but w/ more responsibility. The girls are loving their new school. Maddie had her first assembly today – she got to do an African dance w/ her classmates and play a Nigerian rhythm on the drum.

Both she and Georgia have made wonderful friends quickly. The day after we moved in, they were already going to the park w/ neighbors, and Madison had her first play date by the end of the week. Georgia – that crazy 5 year old – already has her first real crush (CANNOT NAME NAMES) and a birthday party to go to next week. Me? I’m having a blast exploring Portland, taking photos and OF COURSE Blahhhhhging once more. Oh, and I’ve gotten a job. YES I KNOW I HAVEN’T EVEN BEEN HERE 3 WEEKS. But Kismet is Kismet.

I’m finding Portland is small. In a good way. Coming to a brand new city, one w/ roughly the same population as the “neighborhood” I used to reside in, is reassuring. I’m walking everywhere and not getting lost. I say hi to people I meet and almost everyone is friendly. Parents from school have gone out of their way to approach me, introduce themselves and welcome our family. It’s been lovely.

And transitioning back to apartment living after 8 years away has gone fairly well. Except that our refrigerator clucks. LIKE A CHICKEN. At random intervals, for no apparent reason, the fridge begins to BOCK – b-B-BB-BOCK. This goes on for several seconds at a time, then stops. As perplexing, is the unknown tenant who lives above us. I have met the 2 college guys who live downstairs. I have met one of the tenants above. But the other tenant on the third floor remains a complete MYSTERY. I’ve met his, or her, girlfriend, who is very nice by the way. But after 19 days in this building, I’ve yet to meet him/her. His/her name is a very unusual one, one which could go either way (boy or girl). And although we hear ALL KINDS of noises from above – I’ve yet to establish gender. I do not want to be so rude as to ask. IS YOUR ROOMMATE A BOY OR A GIRL>>>??? That just sounds weird. [Though between you & me, I am GUESSING it’s a GIRL.] It’s not like I want to force myself on this person and become his or her best friend. I’d just like to put a face to the noises. name. I’ve come home a couple times and/or been leaving, and have heard the door opening upstairs and someone coming out. But they’ve always waited silently for me to enter my apt or depart the premises before coming downstairs. I am seriously considering some sort of SURPRISE! Say, waiting until he/she THINKS I’ve gone in, but really I am standing outside the door w/ a crazy grin.

What do you think?

The Daily Dish

Putting the FUN in Funicular.

Portland Maine

Meet My House.

My quest for the perfect winter coat. SUCCESS!!

I want to be a Roller Girl.

I want to be a Roller Girl.

WOOT!!

Even the refs look GREAT!

CART ATTACK!

SO???